a close friend of mine is doing a project for giving something very meaningful this christmas.
do you remember the times in secondary school where we'd always make friendship bracelets for our best friends (or at least for people that we like)? if you were a pro at it you might want to have a go at making a friendship bracelet (or two) for orphans in Uganda.
it wouldn't take you an astronomic amount of time to make one; what's more it's for a good cause.
if you want to find out more about it:
http://whenpenmeetspaper.wordpress.com/2010/12/11/the-friendship-bracelet-project/
just make sure you have a photo of yourself with your name, occupation and a few words for the orphan(s) at the back of the photo together with your friendship bracelet(s).
email me at victoriayow@yahoo.com if you want to contribute to this project and i will collate to pass them on.
give something meaningful this christmas.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
all that goes on during an exam.
as i rubbed my tired eyes, i stared out of the window.
it was 8 am and i was on the overground on my way to stratford to change to the jubilee line and then on the docklands light rail. the sun was just about peeking out of the clouds and everything was tinted a hue of orange as i finally felt that calmness ripple within me. i had only managed a 2.5 hour power sleep because of the nerves that were getting to me so many nights before.
the weather didn't feel like it but it was in fact -2 degrees as i see remnants of snow all along the pavements. this time i was equipped for whatever mother nature was going to throw at me because everything that goes on across the river thames is that much harsher. i arrived at the centre 30 minutes later and there already were birds earlier than i, flipping madly through their notes before the exam at 10 am. i wish i hadn't fall victim to the mad rush of last minute studying but it seemed as if whatever i studied just went in from the left and came back out from the right.
after 1 hour of studying i figured that that was it. i chucked all my notes back into my bag and navigated my way to the toilet before heading to the exam hall.
it was crazy. there were at least 3,000 desks and chairs lined up in an orderly fashion. i tried to find my desk amidst the chaos of it all and chucked my belongings to the back of the hall (which is probably 2 minutes away) before i made myself comfortable on my seat. reality of the exam began to set in and my stomach was doing incessant cartwheels inside.
15 minutes later, the exam commenced. i turned the booklet over to reveal all the questions and realised that i knew all that they were asking. but my mind was tossed like a caesar salad as all that i knew were mixed up. i couldn't organise my mind. it made me so nervous i was going to hyperventilate. not to mention i was so tired from the lack of sleep that it was catching up to me. to make matters worse, somebody sitting near me had horrendous body odor and there was this constant stench lingering ever so often in the air. i just couldn't place my finger on who it really was coming from.
45 minutes into the exam, i was getting my act together and managed to finish a question. a quarter of the way in, i was having stomachaches.. good enough to render some toilet business. the toilet was probably 5 minutes away. i did a quick mental calculation and realised i would waste 15 minutes for a toilet visit so i told myself to hold it in.
fighting back the bowel movements and never-ending body odor, i managed to press on and finished all of the questions in record time and speed and unbelievably wrote 40 pages worth of stuff within 3.5 hours. following the exam, i felt as if a load had been removed from my shoulders.
best of all, perfect weather welcomed me as i walked out of the exam centre.
it was 8 am and i was on the overground on my way to stratford to change to the jubilee line and then on the docklands light rail. the sun was just about peeking out of the clouds and everything was tinted a hue of orange as i finally felt that calmness ripple within me. i had only managed a 2.5 hour power sleep because of the nerves that were getting to me so many nights before.
the weather didn't feel like it but it was in fact -2 degrees as i see remnants of snow all along the pavements. this time i was equipped for whatever mother nature was going to throw at me because everything that goes on across the river thames is that much harsher. i arrived at the centre 30 minutes later and there already were birds earlier than i, flipping madly through their notes before the exam at 10 am. i wish i hadn't fall victim to the mad rush of last minute studying but it seemed as if whatever i studied just went in from the left and came back out from the right.
after 1 hour of studying i figured that that was it. i chucked all my notes back into my bag and navigated my way to the toilet before heading to the exam hall.
it was crazy. there were at least 3,000 desks and chairs lined up in an orderly fashion. i tried to find my desk amidst the chaos of it all and chucked my belongings to the back of the hall (which is probably 2 minutes away) before i made myself comfortable on my seat. reality of the exam began to set in and my stomach was doing incessant cartwheels inside.
15 minutes later, the exam commenced. i turned the booklet over to reveal all the questions and realised that i knew all that they were asking. but my mind was tossed like a caesar salad as all that i knew were mixed up. i couldn't organise my mind. it made me so nervous i was going to hyperventilate. not to mention i was so tired from the lack of sleep that it was catching up to me. to make matters worse, somebody sitting near me had horrendous body odor and there was this constant stench lingering ever so often in the air. i just couldn't place my finger on who it really was coming from.
45 minutes into the exam, i was getting my act together and managed to finish a question. a quarter of the way in, i was having stomachaches.. good enough to render some toilet business. the toilet was probably 5 minutes away. i did a quick mental calculation and realised i would waste 15 minutes for a toilet visit so i told myself to hold it in.
fighting back the bowel movements and never-ending body odor, i managed to press on and finished all of the questions in record time and speed and unbelievably wrote 40 pages worth of stuff within 3.5 hours. following the exam, i felt as if a load had been removed from my shoulders.
best of all, perfect weather welcomed me as i walked out of the exam centre.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
what now?
1.5 days to a MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR exam.
what now?
i am literally on the edge of pulling my hair out because of the frustration that lack of sleep has given me. i went to bed at only 6am this morning and got up half past 12 feeling utter exhaustion and a combustable series of emotions. not sure how i was going to tackle this insomnia but it is surely getting to me. i cannot explain enough about how i have no mood for anything or to talk to anyone.
i guess, this is what people call it as tough times.
白杨木影子被拉长 像我对你的思念走不完
原来我从未 习惯 你已不在我身旁
what now?
i am literally on the edge of pulling my hair out because of the frustration that lack of sleep has given me. i went to bed at only 6am this morning and got up half past 12 feeling utter exhaustion and a combustable series of emotions. not sure how i was going to tackle this insomnia but it is surely getting to me. i cannot explain enough about how i have no mood for anything or to talk to anyone.
i guess, this is what people call it as tough times.
白杨木影子被拉长 像我对你的思念走不完
原来我从未 习惯 你已不在我身旁
Monday, December 6, 2010
frustration
i think this is where murphy's law kicks in.
even though it's only 9 days to the flight back home, every single day passes so slow, that it's like 度日如年. having exams during this time is really taking the toll out of me. i am only taking one meal a day because i have absolutely no interest in food whatsoever. getting to sleep is also almost impossible now; i have countless things going on in my mind every time i yearn for some shut-eye.
i know, i just have to hang in for the remaining 9 days and then i'll be granted salvation.
but this wait is doing me no good. i have to keep motivating myself to get over and done with studying so that i don't get that feeling like i'm gonna meet the fat man every time i get past a paper.
i also realised that my days are getting more and more uneventful -- so much as to not gain enough interest to fill up a post. it is that same routine of me waking up at ridiculous times in midday and going out for a coffee fix, then coming home to skype with Gordon, then study (or rather i TRY to) and then sleep (TRY VERY HARD TO). my only comfort is dinner time where i think about what to eat and come up with some new recipe that i eventually photograph and post on my food blog. it is my only de-stress solution.
glad i still have something to look forward to.
just as i was skyping with Gordon we came to this topic about how we'd react to seeing each other again after more than 2 months apart. i didn't know that he was thinking the same as i was. it just feels weird no? we're so close in thoughts yet physically so far apart. nevertheless, i'm so excited.
all the way, last minute wrap buddha leg!
even though it's only 9 days to the flight back home, every single day passes so slow, that it's like 度日如年. having exams during this time is really taking the toll out of me. i am only taking one meal a day because i have absolutely no interest in food whatsoever. getting to sleep is also almost impossible now; i have countless things going on in my mind every time i yearn for some shut-eye.
i know, i just have to hang in for the remaining 9 days and then i'll be granted salvation.
but this wait is doing me no good. i have to keep motivating myself to get over and done with studying so that i don't get that feeling like i'm gonna meet the fat man every time i get past a paper.
i also realised that my days are getting more and more uneventful -- so much as to not gain enough interest to fill up a post. it is that same routine of me waking up at ridiculous times in midday and going out for a coffee fix, then coming home to skype with Gordon, then study (or rather i TRY to) and then sleep (TRY VERY HARD TO). my only comfort is dinner time where i think about what to eat and come up with some new recipe that i eventually photograph and post on my food blog. it is my only de-stress solution.
glad i still have something to look forward to.
just as i was skyping with Gordon we came to this topic about how we'd react to seeing each other again after more than 2 months apart. i didn't know that he was thinking the same as i was. it just feels weird no? we're so close in thoughts yet physically so far apart. nevertheless, i'm so excited.
all the way, last minute wrap buddha leg!
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
i love you mom.
Victoria says: (AM 02:14:21)
ok goodnight
Victoria says: (AM 02:14:27)
love u deep deep under the sea
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:29)
ok goodnight baby
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:38)
have a good rest and sweet dream
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:40)
i mmiss you alot
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:45)
bye
Victoria says: (AM 02:14:45)
ME TOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:15:01)
go to bed
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:15:07)
waiting for you to come home
i miss you too mom. love you.
ok goodnight
Victoria says: (AM 02:14:27)
love u deep deep under the sea
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:29)
ok goodnight baby
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:38)
have a good rest and sweet dream
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:40)
i mmiss you alot
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:14:45)
bye
Victoria says: (AM 02:14:45)
ME TOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:15:01)
go to bed
Geok Lui says: (AM 02:15:07)
waiting for you to come home
i miss you too mom. love you.
the final countdown
writing the title of this post instantly had Europe's "The Final Countdown" in my head.
i can't believe we're finally treading within the regions of december. it seemed like only last week that 2010 kicked off to a blasting start and yet we're now beginning to buy our 2011 diaries. god knows what's gonna happen in the new year, i hope spectacular things it will be.
at present i'm still trying to fight off that annoying time of the month. for some particular reason it is getting increasing arduous for my pain threshold to keep up with the pain piling up every month it happens. if it weren't for sheryl i'd probably have died of pain in my apartment without anybody's realisation. she was the deliverer of ponstan, this ever so vile form of pain killer, and of course a hot water bottle to make me all that much better. i couldn't believe that it was so hard for me to fall asleep and i drifted off only to find myself dreaming that i had stomach cramps (which in reality was actually happening) and woke up to even worse cramps than the night before.
i had managed a miserly 4 hours of rest.
with the help of friendly (and poisonous) ponstan, i've managed to live past the worst of pains and am now sitting infront of my computer, wording my thoughts while trying to shake myself to reality that the exams are dangerously looming. i have officially 1 more week before the next round of exams jump start to life and to be honest i am probably the most underprepared student of the entire lot. not to mention the thought of that treacherous journey to the docklands for my exams (where winds blow at probably 100/mph) (and mind you they are blisteringly cold winds) is just putting me off.
today was eventful for me because it was probably the first time in my life i told myself that i needed to get psychiatric help (before you decide to ditch me as a friend, hear me out) for the depression that i've been experiencing all my life. it is only now during this immense stress that signs of depression are starting to show and i'm really trying my best to not let it extend beyond the containable state.
trust me, it can get pretty bad.
and without any surprise i was preparing myself to break down ever so often during the session and i did, many times. i couldn't contain my emotions to the point that sometimes i felt embarrassed that i was tearing so much. it really tore me up to bring up so many years of emotional backlog, of which i took that many years to bury it in the closet that i was never to explore again. i'm not sure how this would help me rearrange my emotions, let alone have an expectation that i would gain happiness out of this experience. i'm still willing to put my money on it.
i can't believe we're finally treading within the regions of december. it seemed like only last week that 2010 kicked off to a blasting start and yet we're now beginning to buy our 2011 diaries. god knows what's gonna happen in the new year, i hope spectacular things it will be.
at present i'm still trying to fight off that annoying time of the month. for some particular reason it is getting increasing arduous for my pain threshold to keep up with the pain piling up every month it happens. if it weren't for sheryl i'd probably have died of pain in my apartment without anybody's realisation. she was the deliverer of ponstan, this ever so vile form of pain killer, and of course a hot water bottle to make me all that much better. i couldn't believe that it was so hard for me to fall asleep and i drifted off only to find myself dreaming that i had stomach cramps (which in reality was actually happening) and woke up to even worse cramps than the night before.
i had managed a miserly 4 hours of rest.
with the help of friendly (and poisonous) ponstan, i've managed to live past the worst of pains and am now sitting infront of my computer, wording my thoughts while trying to shake myself to reality that the exams are dangerously looming. i have officially 1 more week before the next round of exams jump start to life and to be honest i am probably the most underprepared student of the entire lot. not to mention the thought of that treacherous journey to the docklands for my exams (where winds blow at probably 100/mph) (and mind you they are blisteringly cold winds) is just putting me off.
today was eventful for me because it was probably the first time in my life i told myself that i needed to get psychiatric help (before you decide to ditch me as a friend, hear me out) for the depression that i've been experiencing all my life. it is only now during this immense stress that signs of depression are starting to show and i'm really trying my best to not let it extend beyond the containable state.
trust me, it can get pretty bad.
and without any surprise i was preparing myself to break down ever so often during the session and i did, many times. i couldn't contain my emotions to the point that sometimes i felt embarrassed that i was tearing so much. it really tore me up to bring up so many years of emotional backlog, of which i took that many years to bury it in the closet that i was never to explore again. i'm not sure how this would help me rearrange my emotions, let alone have an expectation that i would gain happiness out of this experience. i'm still willing to put my money on it.
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